UNPROOFED AF.
I did not go on stage at the big club tonight. I left disappointed, but determined to return with a guest so it’s a foregone conclusion like last time.
But then I had a fortuitous moment at the gas station. A few weeks back, I got this swipe card that automatically takes 20 cents per gallon off the price throughout September. Pretty cool.
So I do mine and look up to see a comic I had just seen leaving the big club. “Hey, you pay yet?” I said to him. He said no.
I had never talked to him before, never saw him perform, but had seen him around. I go over and explain the deal, swipe the card, and BAM! the guy gets 20 cents off.
He thanks me and I go back to my car to fill the tank. As I’m finishing, he asks me if I’m going to another open mic I hadn’t heard of. So he shows me his phone and I put the address in my phone out of respect, but I wasn’t sure if I wanted to go.
I didn’t know the place and I find bars with open mics a little intimidating. Usually there’s little separation between performer and crowd. I decided to drive by and check it out. And then I went in.
I was sidling up to the bar to get a nondescript drink, when I see a woman across the bar eyeball me conspicuously. And sure enough, it was only a moment before she wound her way to me and said, “I wanna say hi to my new best friend.”
Her name was LA and she was co-proprietress of the establishment and she sweet-talked me into a double Gentlemen Jack (“I’ll give you the special price”), which I like to calm my nerves before going up. She also introduced me to Boom, the second of the three owners.
When the show started, there was a lot of chatter in the room, enough that the MC, SoccerMom, had to call it out repeatedly, and even then it continued into a few of the sets. The idea of having to compete for attention with people who were there to socialize was daunting.
Long story short, I went in nervous and uncertain, but when I went on stage, I felt weirdly at home and comfortable. Maybe it was LA hyping me from the bar or the guy I could see in the back of the room grinning wildly when I asked if anyone had ADHD (and nobody answered).
I was pretty sure he had it and was appreciating the ADHD jokes because he was nodding pretty vigorously. So I was largely performing for him.
But the entire performance was probably the most joyous stand-up I’ve done yet. I gave zero fucks and riffed on what I had written. And before I knew it, SoccerMom came by with the red light and I wasn’t ready to leave.
That was a first.
The other acts were great too. A totally different vibe and energy. I’m definitely going back. I’m going to see if I can get the video I think LA was taking.
In the meantime, I’ve learned something valuable about performing, which is that not giving a fuck opens you up to experiment.
I left the big club tonight feeling sorely disappointed. I thought my last set was good enough to get me on the list on merit alone. At least for a second chance. No dice.
And once again, the feeling of rejection led to despair led to me being relenting for the night. When I saw the second place, it didn’t seem worth it. Go big or go home, literally.
But the second place? The place I hesitated to go? I actually felt welcomed and wanted in way that I never have at the big club. I’m excited to go back. In fact, the timing is such that if I get on early at the big club, I can still make the other.
I win either way. Chalk up another victory for Team Relent/Less.